SuburbanDaddy

It’s probably an understatement to say Thing 3 does not like change. If his routine, food, clothes, and conversations were the same every day, he would be just fine.
Today he had a new teacher in swim class. Considering how long it took him to feel comfortable with the last one, it was no [...]

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I often think that Thing 3 is from another planet. He is truly an original as you have seen. Today he provided yet another clue.
We were watching Backyardigans, having nothing to do with space travel, when out of the blue he offered this:
Thing 3: I want to go on another planet. [...]

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I got a new iPhone 4S today. One of the new features is Siri, a voice activated assistant that answers your questions. Questions like “will it rain tomorrow” and “what movies are playing tonight.”
Naturally, as soon as they saw it, The Things wanted to ask Siri questions. When it was Thing 3’s [...]

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SuburbanMommy (to Thing 3):  I’m afraid you are going to fall out of your chair if you sit like that.
Thing 3: Mommy, you don’t need to be afraid of me.  I’m not a monster!

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Thing 1: “Why we don’t go to Chuck E Cheese?”
SuburbanMommy: “It’s really crazy there”
Thing 2: “We like it crazy”
Indeed.

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Me: Do you know how you get big, strong muscles?
Thing 3: No.
Me: You eat a lot of healthy foods.
Thing 3: Like Lunchables?
In case you don’t know what Lunchables are, go here.

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Thing 3 has a new sleeping arrangement following a dream episode last week. He woke up screaming one night, terrified of bumble bees. He spent the remainder of that night in our bed. Which means we got even less sleep than normal with his squirming and kicking.
The next night the dreams came [...]

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I am a father of four, educated, with a respectable job and nice home. I should command respect and authority from my kids.
Apparently, that is not the case. SuburbanDaddy has become a source of laughter and joking at the expense of Things 1-3. Thing 4 is too young, but give [...]

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