SuburbanDaddy

Kids will do anything to avoid going to bed.  Last night, we let them stay up while we were watching the president’s press conference.  It led us on a strange path of questions and topics.  Here are some of the highlights.  I wish I was video taping.

Thing 1: What does the President do all day?

Me: [Long pause]  Um.  He helps people that live in our country.  Like when there is a big storm he makes sure they get help.  And he protects our country from bad guys trying to get in.

Thing 1:  How does he stop the bad guys?   How can one person stop all the bad guys?  Is he as strong as Superman?

Me: Kind of.  And he has lots of people helping him.

Thing 2: Is there a door to get into America to keep the bad guys out, and he locks it?  How can he keep the bad guys out if there is no door?

Thing 1: How many elevators are there in the White House?

Me:  [with certainty] There are 2 elevators

I have found sometimes it’s better to give easy to understand, absolute answers so there aren’t lots and lots of followup questions.

Thing 2: How many kitchens are in the White House?

Me: [with certainty] Three kitchens

Thing 1: How do they know which one to eat in?

As you can see, this could – and often does – go on for a very, very long time.  Usually, when I’m in the mood, I play along and add fuel to their fire.  The majority of what I say is true.  So maybe I pass off some guesses as fact.  I’m the daddy and they expect me to have all the answers, right?  Tell me, how would you have handled this one I got last night?

Thing 1: What time does the President go to bed?

I immediately answered with absolute certainty “1:00 in the morning.”  He bought it.