Help! My Kids Don’t Watch Enough Television

Yes, you read that right. I want my kids to watch more TV. I’d like them to sit, quietly, for about an hour and give SuburbanDaddy a few minutes to rest.

I tried to have “movie time” on both days this weekend. On Saturday I built up the idea of watching Finding Nemo, a movie my kids have seen (at least short sections of it). They already know all the characters thanks to product marketing. We barely got past the previews when Thing 1 started asking for the shark part, and Thing 2 was jumping across the couches. Movie time over.

Sunday I tried again with Toy Story. This time, we set up in the basement. We pulled out the sleeping bag and turned off the lights. Both kids had skipped their naps so they were primed for movie watching. If the amount of time they devote to talking about it is any indication, they love Toy Story. They know all the characters and have seen enough to know what it is about. This time, ten minutes into the movie, after ten minutes of fighting over who sits where, and who gets which pillow, they start wandering off to play with trains.

No problem. They are playing nicely (read: not fighting) so I can turn on the football game instead. Ah, if only it were that easy. Thing 1 and Thing 2 have no interest in watching TV, until they see I have an interest, and then they stop everything else and demand to watch. If only they were interested in football. What would you like to watch? I ask them. Toy Story of course. Everyone gets back into the sleeping bags, lights off, movie back on. The bliss lasts just four minutes this time and we’re back to where we started.

Why won’t my kids watch TV? When I was a kid, TV was a marvel. I was happy to watch whatever I could. And the shows were crappy and had commercials, and I had to wait until they were scheduled to be on. No DVR. No on demand. Just a few channels. No remote. And I still watched!

5 thoughts on “Help! My Kids Don’t Watch Enough Television”

  1. LOL! What a funny post. I can identify with you though. I always heard that the TV can be a babysitter but so far, I’ve had no such luck. My son is still only 1 though. All I’m asking for is a few minutes to get a drink, sit back a little…..*sigh*

  2. I found your post on BlogRush-unfortunately, I have no advice, because my kids love watching TV. My almost two year old will watch HOURS of Dora the Explorer, Go Diego Go, and WonderPets. Maybe movies are just too long for their attention spans. Try something shorter, maybe?

  3. Oh, tv is my favorite thing ever! Even my 1yo will sit and watch a movie! Of course I have slugs for children, but it works for me!
    Have you tried Benedryl? LOL, sorry, but it does work for plane rides, and dramamine, I have to give that for car sickness, but it makes for a pleasant ride as a side effect! Nighty night!

  4. Sounds like they might benefit from some attention. And maybe an appropriate outdoor physical activity- a couple times every single day. Television is a sad waste of their developing minds. Your disregard for their potential and selffishness is sickening.

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