How It’s Different The Third Time

Suburban Daddy became a daddy for the third time! (which is why you haven’t heard from me in a while). The birth of #3 is different than the first, and I’ve made some observations along the way.

Compared to #1 and its associated worries (see previous post), the birth of #3 is almost non-eventful. That isn’t to say that the birth of a child is not a big deal. But the whole process is rather matter-of-fact. With the first, you have no idea what life will be like once baby arrives. The birth is the big event that consumes everyone’s attention. You don’t give much thought to the days and months following. With #3, the birth process is a little inconvenience you must get through before getting on with your life, like sitting in traffic on the way to work. This time, as we were heading to the hospital at 11am, I remember thinking Hopefully the baby will be born by dinner so I don’t have to eat hospital food again, and I can get to bed at a decent hour. (He wasn’t born until 11:16pm and I ate dinner from a vending machine).

When we left the hospital with #1, we had the brand new car seat (which we couldn’t figure out how to use), brand new “going home” baby outfit, and we took dozens of pictures with the nurses as my wife was wheeled out in a wheel chair. This time, on the way up the elevator, I dumped crumbs and dirt out of the car seat which had been stuck in the seat since #2 used it over a year ago. There was no time for pictures because I was chasing my other kids through the hospital, and they kept barging into other new moms’ rooms on the maternity floor, first time parents who had no idea what was in store for them.

The first week home is much different too. As a first time parent, the first week home was torture. Learning how to diaper, feed, dress, and bathe a newborn. The seemingly non-stop crying (mostly the baby’s). This third time, the first week home was almost a vacation. I had a week off from work. The older kids were in preschool all day. We could go anywhere with a newborn and he just slept. Nice restaurants, peaceful meals. I played my best round of golf in five years, and bought a new car.

Of course, it hasn’t been all roses. I haven’t had more than two continuous hours of sleep in weeks. Chasing after two preschoolers on weekends is even tougher with a newborn in hand. And I won’t even go into what happens when a kid needs to go potty NOW but you are busy feeding a newborn. But, to all those first timers out there, struggling to get through those first weeks and months, take heart, it will get better the next time.

2 thoughts on “How It’s Different The Third Time”

  1. How funny! What a difference. And what was particularly interesting is that the lack of sleep was the last thing you mentioned – as though it didn’t even occur to you that you COULD be sleeping!

    I hope it’s all going well, and I can’t wait to see #3 on July 1st!

    – Aunt Crazy

  2. We’re thinking aobut #3 as well but aren’t really sure about it. Our second one, a daughter, has been such hard work I’m not sure we can take it one more time. BUt they do say the third is the easiest….

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