Most dads and dads-to-be are aware of the usual duties expected of them. Changing diapers, getting up in the middle of the night, being a human jungle gym. But there are many more realities that are impossible to predict or understand until you’ve been at it a while.
- You are always the last one to eat. First you need to make sure the kids have their food. Then, you need to sit at the table with them to make sure they stay in their seats. Only after they have turned the table into a mess do you get to make your own dinner. And by then, you’ve finished off their cold hotdogs and mac & cheese so you aren’t hungry anymore.
- If you want to eat adult food, you’d better 1) eat quickly and 2) hide. I eat Rice Krispies in the morning huddled over the sink so the kids can’t see what I’m doing. If I ate at the table, they would immediately stop eating their breakfast and demand to eat Rice Krispies “just like Daddy”. As cute as that sounds, it isn’t so cute when they only get a few in their mouth and the rest go on the floor to be stepped on and ground into the carpet.
- Forget about watching sports while the kids are awake. It’s a well established fact that kids are not interested in something until you are. They will be very happy playing in the playroom, that is, until I turn on the TV to check the score. At that instant, they immediately stop playing with toys and want to watch Wiggles. I can’t wait until they get older and actually want to watch the game, at which point I will turn off the TV and say Time for homework!. Let’s see how that like that.
Oh, I can really relate to all of these items! Maybe you know if there’s a special place in Hell for parents who wait until after the kids go to bed to have dessert? That way there are more cookies for us.
(Your brother is doing a good job promoting your blog at work. My husband (aka SuperDad) is a co-worker.)
Great blog, and one for my blogroll!