How Kids Make You Older

Whoever said kids keep you young was either a) lying, or b) didn’t have any kids. Kids speed the aging process. The more kids, the faster the process. It is unavoidable.

There are the obvious signs of aging, like gray hair. Just like every U.S. president goes gray while in office, so does every dad go gray soon after having kids. I found an interesting explanation of why hair turns gray on, of all places, a kids health website. What this site fails to mention to kids is that they are the biggest reason hair turns gray. The endless why questions of a preschooler. The public temper tantrums on an airplane. The 5am wakeup calls consisting of jumping on daddy.

Then there are the times kids make you feel you’ve become that old guy you used to joke about. The guy that drives a minivan, can’t stay awake past 10pm, and falls asleep during football games.

I recently experienced the ultimate in feeling old: driving the babysitter home. On the drive home, she said she can’t wait to get her license soon, making her fifteen. It occured to me that during my college years, which until then seemed like recent memory, was when she was born. How did that happen?

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